A Proclamation to the People

05-02-2010

The exhibition season is surely upon us and the halls are filled with glorious, sparkly doings Ã¯Â¿Â½ everything decked out in its very best energy-saving and sustainable splendour. A recent exhibition experience was so overwhelmingly positive and life-enhancing that a small groupuscle created itself out of the shimmering air, and manifested itself around a table, from the residue of attes, cappucinos and espressos.

Made up of some of the greatest cyneasts of our industry, we immediately dedicated ourselves to a Declaration on the Importance of Good Things, which was hastily written on the back of somebodyÃ¯Â¿Â½s catalogue and signed enthusiastically by all those gathered there. And so was Cyn-Eco-Lite born.

Cyn-Eco-Lite is more than just another lighting business; you might say that itÃ¯Â¿Â½s not a business at all, because itÃ¯Â¿Â½s a way of Being, a way of Seeing - and itÃ¯Â¿Â½s a route to the end of the despair and brutality that has so long blighted the human condition. And itÃ¯Â¿Â½s all because of the LED. ItÃ¯Â¿Â½s been obvious for some time that the LED is the way to healing a very sad world. What weÃ¯Â¿Â½ll be doing at Cyn-Eco-Lite is to accelerate that process.
Consider these constantly-stated factoids:
LEDs do no harm. Where are the lakes and mountains of spoil and waste that we would normally associate with high-tech operations? Where are the ruined water tables? There are none.
LEDs cause no suffering. Try as I may, I can find no one to admit that LED technology is causing the deaths of thousands of Far-Eastern peasant labourers.
LEDs make you happy. Happiness is the most valuable asset that we have, and LEDs actually create it. All those people walking around smiling and shaking their heads in happy bewilderment.

Here at Cyn-Eco-Lite headquarters we are pursuing a vigorous development programme towards a state of absolute bliss through LED technology. One of our very first investigations is based on the natural riches of the earth, and we have great hopes for the success of the Ã¯Â¿Â½Organo-LiteÃ¯Â¿Â½. This LED needs only to be connected to a root vegetable to achieve amazing illumination results. We are particularly encouraged by recent work on the colour variations that have been shown by using the Maris Piper as opposed to the benchmarked King Edward. There is also a suggestion that it may be possible to daisy-chain a series of Pink Fir Apples, and that would be a truly splendid result.

Imagine the possibilities of a light source that is so intimately connected to the world around us that you need only walk out into your garden or allotment for a source of illuminating power; imagine walking amongst others, sharing your illumination merely by holding a potato in your hand.

Further, the horizontal nature of our company structure has allowed the establishment of a citrus sub-group, who have set up a test-house in southern Spain. We await their findings with barely-contained excitement. We are so happy.

IÃ¯Â¿Â½ll tempt you with one more snippet of our work, though I really should keep this under wraps until the beta-testing has been complete. Our development cyneticists have discovered a new substrate combination that appears to generate more electricity than it actually consumes. Once weÃ¯Â¿Â½ve sorted a few headaches with the driver circuitry we will be in a position to launch a wholly new Beyond-Zero-Carbon concept whereby the more light that you use, the more electricity youÃ¯Â¿Â½ll produce. LED lighting will finally be able to pay for itself by feeding surplus energy back into the grid. And that Ã¯Â¿Â½ my friends Ã¯Â¿Â½ is NOBEL territory.

We believe that there are many more cyneasts out there in lighting land who would be want to be a part of our journey. No, this is not just a journey Ã¯Â¿Â½ thatÃ¯Â¿Â½s too small a word. This is a Pilgrimage to the Future. For more information on the work of Cyn-Eco-Lite, please contact the writer. A range of promotional goods and replica shirts will be available later in the year.